15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy

15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy

Here is a list of 15 Things which, if you give up on them, will make your life a lot easier and much, much happier. We hold on to so many things that cause us a great deal of pain, stress and suffering – and instead of letting them all go, instead of allowing ourselves to be stress free and happy – we cling on to them. Not anymore. Starting today we will give up on all those things that no longer serve us, and we will embrace change. Ready? Here we go:

1. GIVE UP YOUR NEED TO ALWAYS BE RIGHT

 There are so many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong – wanting to always be right – even at the risk of ending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. It’s just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need to jump into a fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself this question: “Would I rather be right, or would I rather be kind?” Wayne Dyer. What difference will that make? Is your ego really that big?

2. GIVE UP YOUR NEED FOR CONTROL

Be willing to give up your need to always control everything that happens to you and around you – situations, events, people, etc. Whether they are loved ones, coworkers, or just strangers you meet on the street – just allow them to be. Allow everything and everyone to be just as they are and you will see how much better will that make you feel.

“By letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try. The world is beyond winning.” Lao Tzu

3. GIVE UP ON BLAME

 Give up on your need to blame others for what you have or don’t have, for what you feel or don’t feel. Stop giving your powers away and start taking responsibility for your life.

4. GIVE UP YOUR SELF-DEFEATING SELF-TALK

 Oh my. How many people are hurting themselves because of their negative, polluted and repetitive self-defeating mindset? Don’t believe everything that your mind is telling you – especially if it’s negative and self-defeating. You are better than that.

“The mind is a superb instrument if used rightly. Used wrongly, however, it becomes very destructive.” Eckhart Tolle

5. GIVE UP YOUR LIMITING BELIEFS

about what you can or cannot do, about what is possible or impossible. From now on, you are no longer going to allow your limiting beliefs to keep you stuck in the wrong place. Spread your wings and fly!

“A belief is not an idea held by the mind, it is an idea that holds the mind” Elly Roselle

6. GIVE UP COMPLAINING

 Give up your constant need to complain about those many, many, maaany things – people, situations, events that make you unhappy, sad and depressed. Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that triggers those feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it. Never underestimate the power of positive thinking.

7. GIVE UP THE LUXURY OF CRITICISM

Give up your need to criticize things, events or people that are different than you. We are all different, yet we are all the same. We all want to be happy, we all want to love and be loved and we all want to be understood. We all want something, and something is wished by us all.

8. GIVE UP YOUR NEED TO IMPRESS OTHERS

Stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not just to make others like you. It doesn’t work this way. The moment you stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you take off all your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find people will be drawn to you, effortlessly.

9. GIVE UP YOUR RESISTANCE TO CHANGE

 Change is good. Change will help you move from A to B. Change will help you make improvements in your life and also the lives of those around you. Follow your bliss, embrace change – don’t resist it.
“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls” Joseph Campbell

10. GIVE UP LABELS

 Stop labeling those things, people or events that you don’t understand as being weird or different and try opening your mind, little by little. Minds only work when open. “The highest form of ignorance is when you reject something you don’t know anything about.” Wayne Dyer

11. GIVE UP ON YOUR FEARS

Fear is just an illusion, it doesn’t exist – you created it. It’s all in your mind. Correct the inside and the outside will fall into place.
“The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.” Franklin D. Roosevelt

12. GIVE UP YOUR EXCUSES

Send them packing and tell them they’re fired. You no longer need them. A lot of times we limit ourselves because of the many excuses we use. Instead of growing and working on improving ourselves and our lives, we get stuck, lying to ourselves, using all kind of excuses – excuses that 99.9% of the time are not even real.

13. GIVE UP THE PAST

I know, I know. It’s hard. Especially when the past looks so much better than the present and the future looks so frightening, but you have to take into consideration the fact that the present moment is all you have and all you will ever have. The past you are now longing for – the past that you are now dreaming about – was ignored by you when it was present. Stop deluding yourself. Be present in everything you do and enjoy life. After all life is a journey not a destination. Have a clear vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the now.

14. GIVE UP ATTACHMENT

This is a concept that, for most of us is so hard to grasp and I have to tell you that it was for me too, (it still is) but it’s not something impossible. You get better and better at with time and practice. The moment you detach yourself from all things, (and that doesn’t mean you give up your love for them – because love and attachment have nothing to do with one another,  attachment comes from a place of fear, while love… well, real love is pure, kind, and self less, where there is love there can’t be fear, and because of that, attachment and love cannot coexist) you become so peaceful, so tolerant, so kind, and so serene. You will get to a place where you will be able to understand all things without even trying. A state beyond words.

15. GIVE UP LIVING YOUR LIFE TO OTHER PEOPLE’S EXPECTATIONS

Way too many people are living a life that is not theirs to live. They live their lives according to what others think is best for them, they live their lives according to what their parents think is best for them, to what their friends, their enemies and their teachers, their government and the media think is best for them. They ignore their inner voice, that inner calling. They are so busy with pleasing everybody, with living up to other people’s expectations, that they lose control over their lives. They forget what makes them happy, what they want, what they need….and eventually they forget about themselves.  You have one life – this one right now – you must live it, own it, and especially don’t let other people’s opinions distract you from your path.
 

LUMINITA DANIELA SAVIUC About Author: Luminita Daniela Saviuc.

I’m an enthusiastic student of the arts, economics, psychology and spirituality – and I take great pleasure in shining light on life’s hidden truths, the paradoxes that both stare us in the face and hide from us in unison, as they silently shape our every waking moment.

 

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I WAS KIDNAPPED BY A BULGARIAN HUMAN TRAFFICKING RING


Jemal Borovinov.

Of the estimated 30 million people trapped in slavery around the world, only about 140,000 of them come from Europe. While that might make some Europeans feel a little better about the continent they’re dwelling on (bankrupt and increasingly irrelevant), it shouldn’t. Because a) that makes them more of a narcissist than will.i.am in a hall of mirrors, and b) that slavery statistic is constantly rising.

And it’s been rising even faster since 2007, when Romania and Bulgaria entered the EU, opening more borders and creating opportunities for more nasty people to exploit anyone unfortunate enough to cross their path. Also, thankfully—for anyone twisted enough to root for Europe to up its human trafficking game—Bulgaria currently boasts the EU’s highest annual amount of trafficking victims. So that should help push the numbers up a little more.

In November 2012, 43-year-old Bulgarian Jemal Borovinov and 14 others were taken from their home country and soon found themselves trapped in a human trafficking ring operating in southern Italy. Fortunately, Jemal and his wife managed to escape their captors a few months into their bout of enforced slavery and make it back to Bulgaria. I met Jemal in a petrol station in his hometown of Razgrad to find out exactly what happened to him.

VICE: Hi Jemal. So how did you get yourself into this situation in the first place?
Jemal Borovinov: I was misled. My sister and her husband were working in Germany, picking strawberries and raspberries. A woman called my sister and told her they were recruiting people to work in Italy, paying €30 a day to pick tangerines and oranges. She said you just had to pay €150 euros for travel and another €100 commission to the person who recruits you. My sister and my wife persuaded my brother-in-law and me to take the job. There is a saying: “Never listen to a woman.” I listened to mine once and look at what happened.

I’m not sure that’s a saying. When did you leave Bulgaria?
The four of us left on November 1, 2012 from the Central Bus Station in Razgrad. Ten others, who were all from different parts of the country, joined us in Sofia. We waited for an hour and half, and then two buses turned up. The driver took our money. We stopped at a gas station just before getting on the ferry to Greece, and a few guys came along, chatted to the bus driver, and gave him a stack of fake IDs, passports, and driving licenses. He gave them the money and they disappeared.

Did they give you fake IDs?
The driver asked if we had IDs on us and offered to give us fake ones if we didn’t. He gave me the stack of fake documents, and I saw they didn’t have an official stamp on them. I asked him what they were for, and he said, “Don’t worry, they are for some guys that Interpol is looking for.” I said to him, “I hope our job isn’t as fake as the documents.”

When did you start getting suspicious?
I realized we were trapped when we got on the ferry and they asked for more money. I started arguing with my wife and my sister. Where were these fraudsters taking us? I was sure they were going to screw us up, and there was no way we could escape by this point.


The only picture that Jemal managed to take of the house they were kept in.

Where did you get off the ferry?
In Brindisi, which is in the Apulia region of southern Italy. Then they took us to Nova Siri in the Basilicata region, drove us to the mountains and shoved us all in one house. There was nothing around us except for apricot trees. We were isolated and forgotten from God. There was no food, no water—the place was horrific. The only place we could get water from was four kilometers away. Thankfully, we had some food and tins with us. That’s how we survived.

Were there any other houses?
There was another house a kilometer away where they also tortured people. They would drug the women and convince them to become prostitutes. They made them stand on the motorway near bars that were run by Bulgarian and Italian gangsters. We men were forced to deal drugs. I wanted to kill each and every one of our captors because the situation was a matter of freedom or death. I found out that the Italian men who owned the bars also owned the houses but under Bulgarian names. Apparently this had been going on for 12 years.

Who was actually holding you captive?
Well, the houses were constantly guarded by Bulgarians, who were the cousins of the main guys. The main guys were Turkish gypsies, but they said that they were Pomaks [a Slavic Muslim population native to areas of Bulgaria] and used fake Muslim names. I’m a Pomak myself, and when I spoke to them I noticed their accents, which were completely off, so that gave them away.

What did they make you do other than sell drugs?
I had to drive a bus that they’d stolen. They changed the Italian plates to Bulgarian ones. A bunch of them would come around every night at around 2 AM, usually high, and beat us up before ordering us to steal gas from Italian gas stations. We never picked any strawberries. They also took our phones, money, and IDs away, but luckily I had a second phone that we hid in our dirty socks.


One of the minibuses that Jemal managed to photograph with his hidden phone.

Were you able to communicate with any of the other people being held captive?
Not really, no. Although there was one old sod with us who told us that he’d owed them money, so they went to his house and kidnapped him, his son, and his daughter-in-law. He told me that there had been a lot more people there before, but that they’d managed to escape.

How did you eventually escape?
It was difficult. We managed to get in touch with Ramadan Atalay—a minister from the Movement for Rights and Freedoms party—with our hidden phone. I had also called Todor Dimitrov from Citizens for European Development of Bulgaria (GERB) [the party in power at the time], who I know personally, and he told me, “Don’t bother me with stupid shit like that, I’m at elections in America.”

That’s not very helpful. So did someone come and pick you up?  
No, five of us snuck out during the night when the armed guards were dozing off. The old guy helped us do that and I’m so thankful to him. Without him we wouldn’t have succeeded. So we ran through the fields for about four kilometers until we reached the road, but no one wanted to pick us up, and it turned out that they had caught and tortured my brother-in-law, who told them everything, so they blocked my phone, and I couldn’t call anyone. My wife and I were crying like babies. That’s when I thought, This is the end; we are going to die. And then my wife remembered that she had €20 hidden in her bra, so we managed to get out of there.


The road leading to the house where Jemal was held captive.

Are you going after them now you’re free?
Yeah, I’m suing them. I get threats over the phone and they try to stop me, but they can’t scare me after all I’ve been through. I also sent an official complaint against them to the main police body that deals with organized crime. I hope some of the other survivors will join us. Police warned me not to speak to any journalists, but I spoke to a lawyer, an ex-head of police, and he told me, “Don’t listen to them – it’s better to get your story heard, otherwise a lot of other poor people will also get trapped.” I wouldn’t wish the torture I went through on my worst enemy.

How are the rest of your family?
My wife is in a hospital in Varna. She got diabetes because of all the stress she went through and now needs to be under constant surveillance. My daughter is in second grade and had an anxiety attack when she found out we were trapped. The kid spent ten days in a hospital, and she still stutters to this day. My sister and my brother-in-law are still being held by the fraudsters in Italy.

So what now?
I am never, ever leaving Bulgaria again. I’m going to continue my garlic business and I’m thinking of hiring fields and harvesting strawberries. I’m going to pay my rent for the next five years so I know I’m safe. I know I’ll be in the shit for a while, but I’ll earn my money back.

By Krista Georgieva, Translation: Viktoria Kirkova

Article Source:  http://www.vice.com/read/human-trafficking-bulgaria-south-italy

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